the inspired family

or so it seems some days…

like dear honey pictured here, somedays i find it’s as though i’m actually waiting for something to happen.  not exactly proactive particularly on the heels of a night disturbed by dreams of blatant fiscal irresponsibility… and monkeys.  not exactly a good omen.

but the sense of restless waiting continues and I, like my dear dog, find myself in that waiting place… waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a yes or no or waiting for their hair to grow or… how ’bout just waiting for the ol’ lady to take me for a friggin’ walk!  or in the case of the ol’  lady, waiting for that nice nigerian prince to come through with 3.5 million pounds he promised her in that  email last week!  please, if there’s one thing that drives me crazy is a nigerian prince promising to deposit close to 10 million canadian dollars in my account and then jamming on me.  it’s a matter of integrity after all….

anywhooo… i digress.  dear honey’s waiting did actually pay off today…in a walk in spitting snow with mother nature working her darndest to make us a blizzard.

dogs do joy better than just about anyone.  it’s as though the beast levitates as i take those first promising steps down the stairs off the deck.  for a very sturdy lab-rottie cross, she’s remarkably nimble, the way she writhes with sheer glee in mid-air.  dogs do joy… enviably. i wish to leap while writhing when i’m joyful.  perhaps i might.

today, the simply note- rather than writhe- worthy…

fresh oatmeal cookie(s!) with my kick in the ass this morning.  dozy company at 5:15… the sounds of babar from the darkness beyond my office walls.

conversation with representatives of local developers… and the chance to not only hold my own, but call them out.

my joyful dog… and a neighbour home ’sick’ to share a walk in mother nature’s windy tantrum.

ham sandwich.  warm car and magazines for all, waiting for kids at piano lessons.  old mcdonald had a farm and jolly old saint nick.  a whiff of a first recital!

salt & vinegar chips.  coca-cola.  images ready for clients… ahead of schedule.

inquiries.  usually mean work.

pizza night: fresh chopped garlic, banana peppers, jalapeno peppers, onions, mushrooms, goat cheese and a touch of grated parmesan and extra-old cheddar… i laugh in the face of h1n1- heh heh.

the office.  30 rock.  the unofficial beginning of our weekend.  bed, beckoning… and a new book… of negroes.  everyone who’s read it has raved.  sometimes i just love a sure thing.

waiting… while doing.

dr. seuss.

it’s a summer, and soon to be autumn, that has passed for this 2009 and with all of the photos i’ve shot of the kids, not a one that could be considered a contender for this year’s all-important christmas card… until today.  under the promise of  warming up with hot chocolate and treats at our local coffee shop, i was able to drag the brood off to a favourite portrait location in hopes of a suitable kid portrait for the .

one would think that as a professional i’d have a glut of possibilities. not so.  if anything, this gang can be less amenable out of sheer boredom with having a lens in their faces!  in fact, i have more food chewing, nose-picking, just plain bad attitude shots than any parent- even photographer parent- deserves!

but, despite having to be bribed, everybody totally got into it and mission was accomplished, adding to a pretty durned great day…

energetic practice- hot, sweaty, long… head to knees- yeah, ba-byyy!!

vanilla soy latte, hot chocolate with extra whipped cream and checkers.

less breeze, more sun.

fun with ol’ bessy and my minions- doesn’t get much better for a mid-november afternoon.

a happy client from the weekend… and a subsequent happy referral from happy client booked for next weekend- whooot!

time alone with baby girl… tutus… little girl’s size 11 dance slippers.

the big head of a honey beast resting in my lap asking for loves.

a pinch of time to sneak off for parent/teacher interview… with hubby. ahem.

two boys old enough to be trusted to clean the kitchen alone… and slightly fewer bowls used than yesterday- progress?

happy for tuesday… mondays can just sometimes suck and it’s hard to squeeze out the gratitude… so i just didn’t try.  tucked boys to bed, curled up the girl child with me and fell asleep with a good book.   yesterday… tired, cranky and getting bearings for a new week.

today, a little more on track.  not really digging the down days and wondering, even though nothing tangible changes from one day to the next, what and where is the shift?  hormones?  sleep?  pizza?  I don’t know, but i’d really love the bouts of empowerment, excitement and joy to stick around a little longer.

but, really, a day like today is just fine.  productive.  pretty positive.  taking time for the kids.

oh, and windy.  i’m not much for wind.  just ask my dog… she’s about had it with my skimping on the walks.  i feel guilty every time i pass her eyes gazing at me with needy expectation from the doggy-bed.

but, be that as it may… this day:

while not one for the record books, a day of mostly :

coffee… oh, heavenly hot orgasm in a cup!  ginger snap(s!). morning quiet.

a solid series of  sun salutations I and II, throwing in a glorious dancing warrior… and then letting that be all for today.  listening.  surrender.  the feeling of my back on the floor in savasana… hard but so very welcome.

a morning of solid schoolwork… with all three kids individually!  little or no drama.  cooperation. organization.  lame attempts at fibs- these kids are painfully- comically- transparent.

images.  words.

daddy taking a much-needed break to ruthlessly dominate the world in risk- you can take the boy out of america….

girl child’s gift for mimicry.  belly laughs!  unicorn puzzles.  match game.

possibilities.

edited to add:  kids love tilapia of all things.  the meditation that is washing dishes.  the gentle lure of my bed, which will host story time in less than one short hour.  so you think you can dance- and I do so, but it’s over two hours away, which in my early bird gets the worm world might as well be midnight.

another one opens. yes…  little doors. some even tiny, alice in wonderland doors, curiouser and curiouser, but doors nonetheless.

and open they do…

with fresh inspiration. ideas.  hope.  to be followed closely, and with haste, by inspired action… after all, what is it the gurus say these days, “the universe loves speed!”

well, we’re working under that principle… as we make sure to appreciate the happy, little, occurences that dot our days, keeping us buoyed and moving forward.

a steady flow of fun ideas…  the talents and abilities to see that they evolve beyond mere conversation…

frosty pink lip gloss on sweet, bee-stung, five-year-old lips… voluntary hugs from my boys.

mid-day snow and afternoons, warm and clear… the blue skies of mid-autumn, fluffy clouds, early sunsets, long shadows.  bessy.  lightroom.  wordpress.  android.

a mid-week day of rest and having nowhere to be… an afternoon snooze.  schedules working themselves out.  $100 in the lotto… wtf?!  hello goat cheese and propane for the bbq!

an early pizza night.

eager for more doors… big and small.

Doorknob: D’ooooh!
Alice: Oh! I beg your pardon…
Doorknob: Quite all right, but you did give me quite a turn.
Alice: You see, I was chasing this…
Doorknob: Rather good, what? Doorknob? Turn? Since one good turn deserves another, what can I do for you?

one moment you think you’ve got everything by the proverbial tail, and the next, well… you don’t.

i couldn’t help but laugh over dishes tonight as i considered either, 1. we’re incredibly daring and adventurous, throwing caution and conformity to the wind in this grand experiment…; or 2.  we’re so out to lunch naive it’s positively frigging scary.

but then i stared around my kitchen, the bestest time of day kitchen: dimly lit and freshly cleaned with the reassuring hum of the dishwasher; and rested in knowing that all really is well with our world… regardless whether ours was one of daring adventure or dumb-ass naivete!

with each lemon-scented breath, it all mattered less and less.  because today was just another pretty darn good day, ebbs and all:

as always a good shot of  kick ass tops the days little wonders.  my cookie… kid smell, fresh from sleep, especially when it comes with morning hugs.

another butt-early morning… the best.  my space heater.  my tidy little office, warmed up to sweat lodge proportions.  my laptop… with sirius radio.

mountain sunrise welcomed with yoga. yoga. yoga!!

finishing school module units.  whoot!  a gas fireplace in the schoolroom.  school actually being done in the schoolroom… with little prodding!  funny spelling mistakes.

my urbane and genteel husband’s excitement with today’s accomplishment… his first deer  (honestly, it’s like we’re stepping back in time… considering killing one of the neighbouring wild turkeys for american thanksgiving… erk.)

my honey.  taking time to walk my honey.  her unadultrated  joy the moment we started for the door.

my beanie toque.  tomato soup and crackers.

warm, sunny november afternoons.  stroll with camera on warm, sunny november afternoons.  the lake.

booking a gig for the weekend… that actually works with our swim meet schedule.

health.  a team.  many, many cans in the pantry… oh, and the promise of fresh venison, of course!

up until yesterday, this is where i’d spent two and a half days.  alone.  soaking up sun… warmth… and a little much needed perspective.  in amongst the yoga and meditation, that is.  just a whole lotta goodness all ’round.

the weather, couldn’t have been better.

the company- 12 other women- wonderful… when i chose to find my way into it.

the yoga, just what i needed.

the meditation… something i intend to resume yet again… finding valuable space.

coming home… into the arms of my waiting five year old chickadee, who fell apart against my shoulder before i’d even made it up the stairs to the house.  the boys… happy to see me too, but couldn’t quite be bothered to tear themselves away from the computer to say, ‘hello’.  i found ‘em and squeezed ‘em anyhow.

husband… dutifully cleaning the kitchen.  now, there’s a homecoming!

on this sunny wednesday… an early morning after many ummmm, not so much.  good coffee… and oatmeal cookie. work.  a generous and gracious rcmp officer.  an afternoon snooze. the sun. warm, fresh air. meeting up with a friend.  girlfriends.

time alone.

a new, invigorated practice… and an enthusiastic five-year-old girl to share it with.  a reliable, mature ten-year-old.  a seven-year-old reader. cuddly kittens.  anger.  release.  rest.  renewal.